Several weeks ago Angel asked me if I would be interested in doing a review for Edenfantasys. She informed me about their Ambassador Program in which I would get a free toy in exchange for a testimonial on my domain. Of course, I was intrigued! I love reading sex blogs and toy reviews and always wondered how I could do reviews! She put me in touch with Jenn who was quite helpful in getting me started!

After debating awhile about what toy I wanted (because OMG this site offers so many choices of toys that caters to people (yes they have men’s toys too!) of all types to the beginners, to the vanilla, to the experienced, to the freaky and so on, I ended up choosing a vibrator called Stormy’s Pearl Diver. It’s a G-spot vibrator with bunny ears for the clit I’ve always been interested in buying a G-spot toy because I always hear G-spot orgasms are much more intense – figured now was the time to find out!

I have to commend Edenfantasys first of all for a timely delivery and how discreet they were with their packaging! As someone who lives at home with their mom, it’s hard to be discreet about your toys! I placed the request Thursday I think it was for my toy and by Monday it was delivered in a nice UPS package – you’d never would guess what’s in there just by looking!

The first time I used the toy – I’ll admit I was much more into analyzing the toy itself than actually orgasming but the second time…wow! It is a nifty toy! I liked the curved head, it did hit some nice spots (though don’t ask me if I had a G-spot orgasm!)! The beads itself didn’t do much for me, it really was too far low on the shaft so I had to really force it in to get some kind of sensation from the beads – that was minimal. I could live without it rotating but I know some women really do love the rotation. The bunny ears was what did it for me though – that’s what sold me out of everything despite wanting a toy for the G-spot. Go figure! I really liked that you adjust the speed of both the ears and the rotation so if you want lots of oomph or just a bit of motion

For me there was 2 downfalls which really for me detracted from this otherwise lovely toy.

a) The noise. It is the loudest toy I’ve heard by far and when you live at home and are trying to be discreet. I finally ended up having to go to the bathroom turning the shower on to drown out the loudness so I could get it on! If you are living at home like me and in close quarters, probably not a toy I’d recommend.
b) The batteries. This is the first time since I received a CD player/Radio when I was 11 (it was my first one!) that I had to go out and buy C Batteries! Everyone I’ve told that I had to go out specifically to buy C batteries for looked at me like I was insane (especially for the one who went with me to buy C batteries not knowing why I was buying them!).

Cleaning it is pretty easy but since it is jelly, keep in mind not to use soap. All you need is warm water and a toy cleaner and you’re set. Once you are done, keep it stored in a cool, dark place and you should be set.

I definitely think I’ll be back to this site often enough to check out toys and hopefully do more testimonials! They have a wonderful selection and from what I’ve seen so far, very professional – plus there’s some awesome forums that I need to be checking out more!

I’ve been bad updating here. Emotionally I’ve gone through a lot of shit in the past couple of weeks that I’ve not been comfortable with expressing here knowing that this is accessible by anyone who comes across here. If you are an LJ friend of mine, then you might have an idea of but I couldn’t bring myself just to be open. I don’t know if I ever will be that comfortable without that ability of having friends only posts as my livejournal is set up.

I need…no…want to make an effort here because I do love my domain and if I ever get around setting up my other domain, I’ll transfer over there since I do love that name as well (especially the fact that I get snail mail for some reason addressed to lovebecomesher – makes me giggle). I do want to make something of this blog and not just say that I want to. I want to make friends and meet people and while I’ve been doing that well on livejournal branching out, I want to do that here as well.

So be on the lookout for more from me

We’ve had this mouse (whom I’ve named Ralph after Ralph and the Motorcycle) make an appearance in the apartment from time to time in the past 2 months without any luck of us catching him. He’s tiny and he’d be cute if he weren’t a stray mouse! We’ve had this little black box trap set up ready to go but he’s been sneaky!

I got home today from work and I’m chilling on the computer when Mommy got home from hanging out with Kitty when she noticed the door to the trap is closed! w00t! Except for one problem: neither Mommy or I can bring ourselves to touch the box to throw him out! This leads to Mommy second guessing if Ralph is trapped and thus causing me to second guess myself. After freaking out, she says call Shelly as she figured Shelly would do it…so I did and she agreed (or rather she agreed to bring Yecenia to throw it out for us). Great!

Not so.

They get here and shake the box and lift the box…but nothing. You can’t feel a mouse in there, can’t hear it, doesn’t make any kind of thunk or scratching when the box was kicked or shaken. So Shelly and Yecenia tell us, nope no Ralph and I figure ok, they’re right because what do I know about catching mice? I open the trap ready to set it again when out of the freaking trap comes none other than Ralph scuttling toward the oven!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGH!!!!! Ralph is on the loose again and I go to bed another night nervous that a mouse could potentially climb a wall and into bed with me

In other news…

It’s July 1st so it’s FREE AGENT FRENZY! I love Free Agent Frenzy and seeing where everyone goes! So a few thoughts:

-Does Chicago feel now that they won the Cup, they feel “hey, we can wait another 50 years for another win!” Seriously Chicago, can you stop trading your team away…it’s getting a bit ridiculous.
-It makes me giggle that Adam Burish who made fun of Chris Pronger isn’t a Blackhawk anymore. Jerk!
-I love Antero Niittymaki <3 However I’m quite depressed the Niittyshark (as phrased by my LJ friend who is a Thrashers fan) is now a Shark! At least when he was in Philly or Tampa, they’d play Washington often enough! I don’t get Sharks games here! I guess there is adthe.net when I need a Niitty fix.
-I’m kind of confused though as much as I love Niitty…who gets rid of Nabokov and then decides on Niitty for a number one goalie? I’m really curious now to follow the Sharks season with a Niitty/Greiss tandem! This is his chance to prove himself
-I’ll be happy when someone that’s not the Caps picks up Theodore. However, I’m not so sure how I feel of a tandem of Varly/Neuvy in goal – it could be wonderful or it could be disaster.
-Why did the Habs get rid of Halak for Alex Auld and Curtis Sanford? Do you really have that much faith in Price? I know I don’t and I’m not a Habs fan!
-I really like the signing of Martin Biron as a Ranger except I’m really confused by the Islanders. They’re going with Roloson and DiPietro…who hasn’t played a full season in 3 years?!? That’s what happens when you sign your soul to a goaltender who can’t play.
-I would like to know why Jody Shelley is so hated.
-Boogaard is a horrendous last name!
-I get confused every time I go to the hockey TSN site and they talk about a capital situation and I think they’re talking about the Caps only to remember it’s a Canadian site and thus they’re talking about the Ottawa Senators.
-Actually I take that back on the goalie situation in Washington…dear Caps who I adore…please get Nabokov or otherwise please keep Theodore? I don’t want to see any of the other free agent goalies as a Caps player and I don’t like the idea of Varly/Neuvy! Kthx!

I slept until two today! I don’t believe it! Seriously cannot remember the last time I slept that late and I didn’t even go to sleep ridiculously late (2 AM). I guess I needed it and it makes up for last week where many nights I was waking up almost every hour and not feeling so rested.

Despite sleeping until 2, I feel productive today. Irene and I went to Wheaton Library and bought a bunch of books for our classroom library, hit up Target for fun stuff for the classroom, and got some Starbucks too. I also finished finally the nametags (just need Mommy to cut and laminate for me because I’m afraid now that I’m going to break another laminater!). Back to work tomorrow but I’m ok with it as I work tomorrow full day and then work half day Friday and have a 3 day weekend! I just need to figure what I’m doing. I was thinking about going to see Jon but he’s going to his friend RJ’s bachelor party on Saturday night so I would have to leave Sunday and I’d basically be with him for 9 hours (he gets home at 3 from work and we’d go to sleep midnightish) and he has to work Monday morning 6 AM so I’m still debating if I want to make that drive. Truc is supposed to be down from NY and Rachi sent out a Facebook message so maybe plans can be formulated. I realize I’ve never had the same two 4th of July experiences since I turned 18 or spent it with the same people. It’s a bit strange. Looking over past LJ entries:

2004 I spent it with the ex sitting near the Washington Monument watching the fireworks with him and his family.
2005 I hung out with AM, JC and Shelly and we saw them at Wheaton Plaza.
2006 I ended up going with Alina and Arthur to Rockville to see the fireworks because Shelly and Ken got into a fight.
2007 I spent the 4th with Jon up in Allentown – the 4th was rained out and so the 5th, we went to J. Birney Crum Stadium and played Skipbo until the fireworks started (we’re dorks I know!).
2008 I watched the fireworks on TV with Mommy and Aba at the Legacy Hotel in Rockville where Aba was staying at.
2009 I went with Rachi up to Sean’s house in Davidsonville and we had a BBQ, swam, and set off fireworks.

I wonder what 7/4/2010 will bring?

So then off I went to work on my day off (I needed to get stuff done) and on my way, I stopped at the Starbucks in Burtonsville to see Eva and get me some coffee and breakfast (after seeing a bus that said Derech Eretz and wondering where it was coming from because you obviously can’t drive here from Israel! That would be random thought 3!). It made me smile that she made my frappacino and drew all over my cup smiley faces and hearts (and a smiley with vampire teeth as she’s being dragged by Puffy tonight to go see the new Twilight movie) – I guess that’s what best friends from 7th grade are for – to put a smile on your face when you need it! I also got a huevos rancheros wrap for the first time (I always get the reduced fat egg white sandwich with turkey bacon)…this leads to random thought 4, 5, and 6. 4: Cilantro has a strong smell…finally see what Mommy is talking about when she rants about how much she hates cilantro. 5. The cilantro in that wrap is quite strong tasting as well – first time I can identify the taste of it separately, I can see why Mommy hates it. It is a love it or hate it taste. and 6 which made me giggle and call Mommy… the two things Mommy hates more than anything are cilantro and cats…I should threaten her with cilantro covered cats! She was not so fond of the idea when I told her but I like it!

I worked from 11 to 4 which wasn’t too bad. I l<3 Mandy’s son – he’s 2 years old and walked around with his Buzz Lightyear toy and ball in hand and all I could think (random thought 7) was I wouldn’t mind having a 2 year old around all the time. They’re quite entertaining to watch! Thought 8 is also brought to you by my job as Kathy came into the classroom wanting to show off her new arm chair that she has in her classroom for the kids to snuggle in as a reward and all I can think of was fuck the kids, I want to snuggle in that chair and fall asleep! Where’s my armchair in my classroom? Can we introduce naptime as part of the classroom day?????? Ugh and I broke up the brand new laminator I bought and as I broke it, random thought 9 comes into play as I swore my undying hatred toward the laminator and we’re now fierce enemies. I think I’m making Irene laminate anything from now on.

10 is brought to you by the Montreal Canadiens who just made me scratch my head because who the fuck gets rid of Jaroslav Halak, puts Carey Price as the starter and then brings in of all people, Dan Ellis? Don’t know who Dan Ellis is? Neither did I…however, he was the backup goalie to Pekka Rinne (who I just think has an awesome name) in Nashville. Yes, they got rid of Halak and didn’t even get anyone good? Who does that??? Montreal has slipped in my order of teams that I like on that deal. It’s not guaranteed though he’ll sign so we shall see…

My last random thought today is also work related … I have to make name tags for my students and I’m talking to Irene about it because she wanted a Superhero theme which I like but it’s so hard to pick a superhero for each child and then wonder if they’re going to like the superhero we chose and would that just lead to whining? As we’re talking, a Toy Story 3 commercial pops up and I think OMG, that would be a perfect theme and she agreed! So we start thinking of characters each of ours students could be…and oddly enough each of the characters fits our students quite well though I wish I could make JJ and NA (two boys) Mr and Mrs Potato head…because they are that old married couple! I made one Mr. Potato head and one the alien as otherwise, they’d kill me.

Ugh it was so muggy and hot today that my glasses steamed up! Can I have Spring back please?

So I was browsing through memes (I like the daily meme website) and there’s a Manic Monday meme that had a question that caught my eye:

Imagine you could go back to the age of five and relive the rest of your life, knowing everything that you know now. You will reexperience your entire adolescence with both the cognitive ability of an adult and the memories of everything you’ve learned from having lived your life previously.

Would you lose your virginity earlier or later than you did the first time around (and by how many years)?

I recently had this conversation actually with Eva and Lina (at different times too haha). I sometimes wish when I think back to middle school, I knew what an straightening iron was and I had the nerve to wear cute clothes because all I wore were huge baggy t-shirts with the front tucked in and the back hanging out (these shirts are still absolutely huge on me!). Had I worn the cute clothes and my hair wasn’t so frizzy, I wonder if I would have been more popular and thus attract the attention of the guys I had a crush on (hey, maybe Teddy would have danced with me at the 8th grade dance rather than telling me he didn’t dance only to be seen 5 minutes later slow dancing with Marissa! Jerk!). I had no prospects in middle school and that’s perfectly okay because well what the hell did I know about sex beyond the notebook that Eva and I kept with all our stories and my love of romance novels!

But then I didn’t really have that many prospects in high school that I would have considered sleeping with. Maybe had I been hanging with that popular crowd, I would of had more prospects *ponders about certain classmates naked back then*. Then again, I remember my senior year Ian came over and I was paranoid that Mommy was going to find a hickey on me after we made out. I could have easily lost my virginity then – Mommy was at work and we were in my bed (and on the floor!). I was too paranoid not to! I don’t think I would of! Plus I remember being way too shocked when Mary lost hers when we were 16 and thinking WTF, that’s way too young! I still think 16 is too young!

Come to think of it, there’s only really one guy I really wanted to lose my virginity to in high school. Maybe had the timing been right and we actually dated, sure, I would of. Either way, we did end up having our one night…when I was 19 and after I lost my virginity! Timing has never been our friend! So after all that’s said and done…all I really wish was that I waited 5 more months from the time I lost my virginity and then I would have lost it to the guy I wanted to! I would have been then 19 rather than 18. That’s all I really would change after I really think about it.

But then I realized the opposite is true in my case…I do try and I feel as if I’m getting rejected by the ones I call my friends. I have barely talked to 3 of my closest friends in two months because they’re so wrapped up in their boyfriends (or husband as the case may be) that I feel like I’m just an afterthought. I don’t expect to talk to them 2 hours a day, 14 hours a week (as Lina’s friend expects of her) but I would like to hear from them more once a month or so and maybe actually see them once in awhile . I seem to find out what’s going on in their lives based on their Facebook statuses rather than them actually talking to me. I know I’ve been playing phone tag with one of them so it’s not as if I’m completely forgotten but I’d like to see sometimes more of an effort than me trying to do it all the time. And then there’s my best friend who I either hear from her on a regular basis and then she doesn’t call me for a month or two. I’ve given up calling her – at this point if she wants to talk, she can call me. Cold maybe. I spent 6 months in college calling her on a regular basis begging her to talk to me and just tell me what’s wrong with her and she wouldn’t answer my calls. I won’t go down that road again. Most of my closest college friends I barely hear from either and I know they’re really busy and wrapped up in work and life but it would nice to hear from them once in awhile.

I feel like I’ve very few friends that I can really talk to right now about anything that I trust or just spend time with. There’s Jon. But what happens when I want to talk about my doofusface to someone else or need advice? I can’t go to him to bitch about him. Micah is in VA and works a lot. I can go to Shelly but I know she’s busy with Ethan and work and her own problems. I’m just rebuilding a friendship now with Charlie. Jason I know is busy and dealing with a lot of drama. Yup 5 people. Well 6, if Romeo got his cell phone back and it was easier to contact him – but he tries nonetheless. I know it’s quality over quantity and I believe that wholeheartedly. However, to be honest, I’m also lonely. Yes I’ll admit that.

Charlie has been telling me I should join some kind of activity to meet people and make friends such as joining a kickball league. I see my Facebook friends post their pics from their kickball leagues and it looks like fun. I’m thinking about joining one that starts next month. Beyond that I don’t know what to do and I hate that I just feel stuck at home with no one really to talk to. Any ideas of what else I could do to get out there and meet people?

I used to think if I ever moved, what would I do without my friends. I thought I’d be lost. I’m still here and I feel lost without them so what’s the difference, I wonder?

/whiny look at me post here.

Unfortunately, I must as even if I don’t make it by 10 AM to Tommy’s mother’s unveiling at the cemetery in Adelphi, I should at least go to Esther’s afterward and pay my respects, see the family, and have some yummy lunch. Plus Monday I’m going into work to help Irene with the classroom. Alas, my vacation with a doofus is over

Jon and I had an interesting discussion about religious practices dealing with death and mourning in Christianity and Judaism which he brought up something I had never really thought about before. He pointed out Judaism seems to deal with death using systematic desensitization while Christianity tends towards flooding. What do I mean?

In Judaism to simply give the basic overview, when someone in the family dies, the family of course has the funeral. There is no viewing typically as the belief is you want to remember the person how they were and not in death. Lot of prayers are said, eulogies spoken, shirt torn, and dirt is thrown on casket by mourners and their friends (worst sound in the world in my opinion is hearing that final thunk). The family will sit Shiva anywhere from 3-7 days (excluding Friday night and Saturday – Shabbat) while people come and visit every day/night and bring food plus more prayers are said. There are restrictions of what one can and can’t do when one is a mourner (shaving, looking at a mirror, going to parties come to mind but there are others). After the Shiva period, there’s a 30 day period of mourning (still no shaving) where one can go back to work but don’t go out much otherwise. Then there’s the one year unveiling where the tombstone is laid out. Finally every year to commemorate the death, a Yizkor candle is lit and stays lit for 24 hours. Systematic desensitization.

While I’m no expert on Christianity by any means, from what I understand, when a person dies, there’s a viewing to help to come to terms and say final good byes. The funeral happens, prayers and eulogies are said at the cemetery and the person is buried (while you’re not even there to see – that’s a shock to me) …and that seems to be about it. There’s no restrictions, no nothing. Flooding. You’re thrown into it and face the death head on and you move on with your life.

To me, it’s like do you jump in the water or do you dip your toe in the water to test the water out and then slowly wade in? Me, most times I’m a wader – I’m not much for jumping in the water right off the bat. I wonder if many Jewish people like me are also waders when it comes to the water and that’s why mourning the Jewish way makes sense (at least it does to me). Maybe though there is something to it to be a jumper?

1. People who like to think they can judge me and how I live my life and how I should handle my relationship with my father and what I should do for him. And no, you do not know what I’ve been through with him so STFU.
2. TV shows not loading. I love Ramzor but episode 4 is driving me insane not loading properly!
3. Not pooping. Enough said.
4. Being around people who don’t talk much. I’m awkward enough as it is – please do not make me feel more awkward and self-conscious!
5. Awkward hello’s and goodbyes.
6. Family members jumping to conclusions and not taking the time to think something through!
7. The Dustin Byfuglien trade…what was Chicago thinking? Better yet, why weren’t they thinking?
8. The big deal over Taylor versus Tyler…who cares who’s going to be number one in the draft? Lot of the times it seems the big names were lower numbers in drafts.
9. The fact that I kept refreshing around 7 PM tonight to see if it was going to be Taylor or Tyler as number one.
10. It takes way too long to restore my energy on Treasure Isle on Facebook…can I please get to the bottom of the volcano already so I can return to my regularly scheduled program of actually searching for treasures on islands.
…and as a side note, why am I not an actual treasure hunter? or a penguin feeder?

I don’t think I’ve inherited this matchmaking gene. Not for the lack of trying!

I tried once matching Charlie and Lidia up. It seemed to go okay until something happened on their date and she called me up telling me about he complained of how much money he spent on on buying her dog some dog treats. Needless to say, that did not end well. I tried setting up Micah and Lidia until she freaked out that he wore mismatched socks with shorts when we went to Six Flags and wouldn’t go on a date with him after that.

Maybe I just shouldn’t be hooking Lidia up with people. That’s okay though; she credits me for getting her together with Steven (her boyfriend). I didn’t do anything though besides go with her to Mike’s party up in Damascus somewhere and then drive her and Steven’s drunk asses to IHOP at 4 AM to meet up with everyone else. Actually I drove her car because she couldn’t drive and then she proceeded to have sex with Steven in the backseat (which from what I hear he doesn’t remember…sadly I do). Either way she credits me and I’ll take it even though I didn’t do anything and I don’t talk to her anymore lol.

I tried hooking Micah up with Tanya. That would have gone well and surprisingly, he would have gone on a second date with her even after the infamous line “Oh you’re an orphan? My father is too.” However, she was not so interested…I think that’s because she was dating Choppy and didn’t say anything.

Then there’s Jenny who I tried setting up with Wesley (I went to middle school with this guy and at the time was quite popular, now he’s just creepy)…that didn’t work out so well as she told me he never grew out of that middle school mentality despite having a daughter now. Somehow not surprised.

Now Charlie is trying once again to get me to find him someone. I wonder what’s the secret to matchmaking to actually get matches to work though? Can someone teach me how to be a successful matchmaker?